Toxic masculinity: 5 psychological profiles revealed by science (and how to recognize them)

Toxic Masculinity: 5 Psychological Profiles Revealed by Science (and How to Recognize Them)

The term "toxic masculinity" is now ubiquitous, but its use remains vague. A recent study conducted by New Zealand psychologists (published in Psychology of Men & Masculinities) sheds light on this concept by identifying five distinct psychological profiles. These profiles explain why some men exhibit harmful behaviors – to themselves and those around them – often without realizing it. Let's break it down.

Why This Study Is a Game Changer

Since the #MeToo movement, toxic masculinity has often been associated with physical or sexual violence. However, the New Zealand study shows that it takes on much more subtle forms: emotional repression, social pressure, or even contempt for vulnerabilities. The problem? These behaviors are rarely labeled as "toxic" by those who adopt them.

"Toxic masculinity is not a character flaw, but a system of beliefs that is learned and reproduced." —Excerpt from the study, Psychology of Men & Masculinities

The 5 Profiles of Toxic Masculinity: Who Are They Really?

The research team analyzed hundreds of cases to identify five archetypes. Here are their defining traits, with concrete examples to help you recognize them.

1. The Dominant Man: The King of Control

• Key Behaviors: Constant need to dominate (at work, in relationships), contempt for female opinions, demeaning humor ("sexist jokes"), and pathological jealousy.
• Example: A manager who systematically interrupts his female colleagues in meetings or a partner who makes all the household spending decisions alone.
• Impact: Creates an environment of fear and submission, often without realizing it.

2. The Stoic: The Man Who Never Cries

• Key Behaviors: Categorical refusal to show emotions ("men don't cry"), self-destruction (alcohol, excessive work), and explosive anger when frustrated.
• Example: A father who forces a smile when his 5-year-old son cries, or a colleague who drinks alone at the bar after an argument.
• Impact: Social isolation and increased risk of depression or suicide (men are 3 times more likely than women in France).

3. The Rigid Traditionalist: "A Real Man Doesn't Do That"

• Key Behaviors: Strict adherence to gender roles ("men protect, women raise"), rejection of "feminine" professions, and hostility towards feminism.
• Example: A man who refuses to do the dishes ("it's your wife's job") or who mocks a friend who does yoga.
• Impact: Reinforces inequalities and limits personal fulfillment (for him and others).

4. The Passive-Aggressive: Violence Without Physical Harm

• Key Behaviors: Sarcastic criticism, slamming doors, punitive silence, or calculated "forgetfulness" (e.g., not picking up his child from school).
• Example: A spouse who responds with phrases like "You're too sensitive" when asked to talk about a problem.
• Impact: Insidious psychological wear and tear, often minimized ("it's not a big deal").

5. The Toxic Isolator: "I Don't Need Anyone"

• Key Behaviors: Rejection of requests for help ("figure it out yourself"), contempt for "too emotional" male friendships, and worship of extreme autonomy.
• Example: A man who cancels a date with friends because he "has something better to do," or who ignores messages from his brother in crisis.
• Impact: Chronic loneliness and difficulty creating healthy relationships.

Toxic Masculinity vs. Healthy Masculinity: How to Tell the Difference

Not all men are toxic. The difference? Healthy masculinity is based on empathy, vulnerability, and respect for others. Here are some indicators to help you distinguish them:

• Toxic: "I must always be right."
• Healthy: "I can admit my mistakes and learn."
• Toxic: "Emotions are for the weak."
• Healthy: "I can express my sadness or fear without shame."
• Toxic: "I must manage everything alone."
• Healthy: "I ask for help when I need it."

How to Act: Tools and Resources to Deconstruct These Patterns

Recognizing a toxic profile is a first step. Here are some ways to change:

For Men Concerned

• Specialized Therapy: Some approaches (such as cognitive-behavioral therapy) help identify toxic beliefs.
• Support Groups: Organizations like Men For Men (France) offer safe spaces for men to share their experiences.
• Reading: The Men Who Cry by Philippe Brenot or Masculinity in Shards by Boris Cyrulnik.

For Loved Ones (Partners, Friends, Family)

• Address the issue with kindness: Avoid accusations ("You are toxic") and instead say "I noticed that when you... it hurts me."
• Offer resources together: Watch documentaries like The Mask You Live In (2015) or read scientific articles.
• Set boundaries: Do not tolerate passive-aggressive behaviors (e.g., no longer accept punitive silences).

The Role of "Allied Men": How to Contribute Without Falling Into the Trap

Men who do not identify with any of these profiles can play a key role by:

• Calling for accountability: "Brother, stop talking like that in front of your sister."
• Sharing their own vulnerabilities: "I also get stressed at work, and I talk about it with my wife."
• Supporting initiatives: Share articles, participate in equality workshops.

Warning: Avoid victim-blaming ("you are also responsible") and toxic saviorism ("all men are like that"). The solution lies in education and introspection.

Conclusion: Towards a Responsible Masculinity, Not "Toxic"

Toxic masculinity is not a fate. By identifying these profiles and understanding their mechanisms, everyone can choose a different path: a masculinity that is free, empathetic, and balanced. As the New Zealand researchers point out, the change begins by recognizing that these behaviors are not "natural," but learned.

And you, which profile do you recognize (in yourself or around you)? Share your experiences in the comments – together, we can make a difference.

Additional resources:

• Psychology of Men & Masculinities (original study)
• Men For Men (French association)
• The Mask You Live In (documentary)

Never forget to play safely!

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